Why Moms Are Miserable | Sheryl Ziegler | TEDxWilmingtonWomen

Video quality	The size	Download

Information Why Moms Are Miserable | Sheryl Ziegler | TEDxWilmingtonWomen

Title	:	Why Moms Are Miserable \| Sheryl Ziegler \| TEDxWilmingtonWomen
Lasting	:	10.11
Date of publication	:
Views	:	1,2 jt

Set aside time with your partner, your kids do not have to be your identity Communicate with your partner, you both have needs and a relationship takes work especially with children If your partner loves you they will listen and attempt to help you
Comment from : Dr Duck MD

i fell my life is over now that I'm a mom without any supports from family i am so exhausted 12/09
Comment from : yang yang

I wanted to see uplifting videos on how great it is to be a mom… now I’m just sad 😢
Comment from : Caroline

No one wants to visit me I have 3 kids ages 1-5 When I told my dad I feel exhausted he said well you and every other mom doing the same thing Like what kind of support is that I'm on the edge of a breakdown and it's normal tho
Comment from : Tessa

Literally no relatable info out here and this is part of it
Comment from : Amanda Perry

Women do what you want in life Just be sure Weigh the pros and cons
Comment from : Nettie Starr

I’ve been a single mom for 25+ years Working full time Taking care of everything on my own If I was in the hospital, no one would care except the kids who would have to cook their own food Life is terrible I can’t wait to die
Comment from : LillyJane78

moral of the story : don't have kids lol
Comment from : Whatevervlogs

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Comment from : Sandra OConnor

I can't decipher a clear point
Comment from : joe blunt

we give,give,give an often accused of take take take,its crushing ,trying to be an do best by everyone, we carnt be ill or who picks kids up,we carnt work as we probably wont earn enough, i have prison fantasies, i could work,play,rest an still not get paid 😂 no real support ,disabled people get more consideration but we are crushed💔abused an hurting
Comment from : Mel West

Thank you for this ted talk Women need each other Lets make it easy and normal for women to befriend each other easily It is in the interests of some that women do not have camaraderie like men do Watch a show or movie aimed at men, you'll notice that regardless of the macho, there will still be a loving and supportive brotherhood or "fraternity" of some type Men are good at loving each other even if their personality does not allow for romance
Comment from : Autumn is hotter than Summer

So now we all agree we feel this way, where are support groups to help us deal with this?
Comment from : Crystal Thompson

How many woman drove the man away with thier insistent ingratitude no thanks I'm out!!!!!
Comment from : William Martinez

I am so happy that I choosed a childfree life
Comment from : Cordelia Wagner

Actually, women that are mothers not depressed for the reasons you gavebrThey are depressed because they are undergoing a personality change created by kids Kids dictate who a mother is going to be Bus stop mom, pta mom, soccer mom and so onbrThey don't know who they've becomebrTotal stranger
Comment from : Kathleen Joyce

So true This helps so much at home bc Wifes can vent to each other and their woman friends can relate
Comment from : LILY and MIKE

Watching this a single mom ………
Comment from : Elizabeth Lopez

American moms isolate themselves They all feel the same Make friends and spend time with your friends and look after each otherbrEven a phone call is enough Schedule it if you need to
Comment from : Kate Late

Communal living is the answer Recreating the village, the tribe, with a modern flare brI see friends everyday and it’s still not enough I’m deeply dissatisfied because I have a deep primal yearning for something that humans used to have which was a tribe of humans around at all times… kids feel the same lack
Comment from : Emily Dudley

Motherhood is a mistake, big time Instead of wasting my time having kids , I followed my dreams of being an artist and designer I marketed my work, moved to Europe I saw Italy, Greece,ETC Sold my work and retired before 40 I spend my days near the beach , getting uplate, having breakfast by the pool After that I go shopping for clothes, go to the market This would not have been possible if I had made the mistake of marrying and having kids Even as a stay at home mom , this would have been a bad idea even if he paid for everything I wouldn't enjoy having my creativity destroyed by a kid I would have wound up stuck in a damn house all day and probably wound up homeless, on welfare and foodstamps I have an LTR but don't have to account to him for anything so we get along well Women get taken in by the media, all those women-s magazines about how women need a man It is bs The have kids to trap a man into getting a home and financial support Another deal breaker is if you have kids, kiss your freedom goodbye because somebody will always report you to Child Protective Services for something or other Too many people are spiteful liars that just want to wreck your life Nobody can report me or get control over me because I have no kids
Comment from : Patricia Martin

Is she ok?
Comment from : Halo Mcdonald

My mom never saw the good in me in anything I joined the military for 22 years and retired, she’s never supported me on anything, tried to destroy my friendships She’s not a good person to be around and has wanted to keep me from being out in the real world Some folks want to say she’s trying to protect me but it’s definitely manipulation
Comment from : Mario Bryant

I am pressured into giving up my career, because I am told it’s what has to give now I love my baby but my mental health is at an all time low It’s funny because I’m encouraged to speak out yet I can’t because my husband doesn’t understand and is very judgmental He doesn’t understand full stop
Comment from : ANNIZ 91

Feminism is issue too as women compete with men and want best for children while sacrificing their health brSociety pressure makes things toughbrEspecially in Christian people not taught to spend time for themselves but only to sacrifice- it’s wrong
Comment from : SOLO

Single mom since 15 and trying to get my life together , currently in college and working and trying to take care of my health and shower atleast I’m exhausted and I need help but I never had a loving family and all friends left I feel like giving my kid to my abusive ex (still harrasses me to this day) I’m tired And I need help
Comment from : J Ayala

I need this SO SO BAD I’m so so tired and tired of saying I’m tired I don’t even feel part of this log anymore, just a placeholder for people to ask questions, cook and clean -next It’s depressing
Comment from : IAintY0M0mma

Read through these comments and the amount of man-blaming is honestly pretty toxic and depressing Half of these wives are primed and headed straight for divorce The grass is greener and no concept of how to coexist and be solid as a team Only envy that their husband has it easy and no real idea how his contributions are also difficult No communication of needs, or asking what the husband's unmet needs might be No reciprocation br brBoth people thinking they're getting the short end of the stick The children are the actual ones who drew the short straw They get to go to parks, sports games, etc and have their parents "watch" them, when they look up to say "watch me dad/mom" they see the parent didn't even hear them They see the light from the screen shining on their parents face and know they will never be able to compete for the attention the screen gets br brThat's just sad realizing more families will be split up and children forced to grow up messed up households where they can feel a parent doesn't want them I know my life as a single dad is hard, and I know moms have it real tough (single or not) It's often nobodys fault however Start by putting down the screen, giving your wife (or husband) 100 of your attention for some shared time, and same for your child Do this BEFORE you go looking for a friend to fix things Once your own life is in order, you are much more ready to be emotionally available, have empathy, be a good listener, etc - all the things required for long term friendship br brLife with kids is wonderful! Many phases and stages that require different approaches Same for life in a reciprocal / team oriented marriage Lets rebuild relationships and let go of technology that is driving us apart and keeping us tired & ridden with anxiety We can do this fellow humans!
Comment from : Iron lungs

You see what's weird is I don't like being around people too often I am very creative and would rather be with animals or writing or painting
Comment from : Black Stag Art Studio

No one takes care mom!
Comment from : BoyMom-Teacher

Maybe women can join organizations like Country Women’s Council of USA and become active in that way Alternatives are Women’s Institutes in UK and Country Women’s Association of Australia
Comment from : Kassr Ripples

Women are always victims
Comment from : Victor

Its not motherhood, focus on career or trying to juggle both and finding balance that makes mothers unhappy Women tend to comparison, women lack support, women lack community within motherhood, women tend to try to please everyone, and they also give top much value to other peoples opinions Wen women become mothers, they tend to take it on as thier whole identity and not part of it They make thier whole fuckin life revolve around children
Comment from : Sandra

Sometimes I feel that motherhood (in our society) it’s a Trap!!! I remember being single, enjoying my life, going out flirting, working being happy and from the othr hand I was looking at moms with little kids and they seemed so sad, depressed most of them! I have the super power of feeling people so deeply and I was feeling sorry for them & promised to myself that when and if I want to have children in the future will consider carefully the circumstances 5 years later I had a pregnancy by accident and I got so surprised and confused! I had my baby, he is 18 months I love him so much but oh my god, what a rollercoaster motherhood is I never felt more unhappy & happy in the same time in my life ! Right now trying to have balance with everything, hubby , family, friends being useful in our company let’s hope I’ll make it but it’s a constant battle
Comment from : Georgia Fuga

Either take pride in being a mother or stay In Austin and don’t have a child
Comment from : John Lewis

Not every women is good enough to raise a child…do humanity a service and don’t let your child see the screen of your phone ever!
Comment from : John Lewis

Ay Dios nos ayude por qué estamos pasando cosas horribles en nuestra mente y No estamos entrandos stay healthy people
Comment from : Mary

Yeah that's all very well but I guess I will be alone forever cos honestly? Most people are selfish assholes who you can't trust So I guess I am doomed I'd rather be alone and miserable than be reminded just how REALLY alone you are when being around other people
Comment from : Gothic Ghosts

It’s the men
Comment from : Sophbookers

The husband and his needs and demands!!!! 😫
Comment from : Brandi Latham

Love this❤
Comment from : iamloved iamamzing

It's the hypocrisy Can we acknowledge that everyone who grew up with deadbeat mothers is a societal problem You can grow up without a 'Dad' But those who grew up with 'BAD MOMS' wreak havoc in society We are not equal Men and women balance And btw men are reflections of MOM AND DONT DATE OR COMMIT TO A MAN who HAS MOMMY ISSUES THEY ARE PSYCHOPATHS
Comment from : Janine Change

I’m a single dad and I feel all of this as well
Comment from : Key Soteriq

Well if you think this way you shouldn't have been blessed with being a mom Being a mom is the best thing ever Yes, it can be tiring, but you gotta learn how to live with it
Comment from : Stefania Um

I couldn't agree more!!
Comment from : Charlene

Anxiety keeps me apart from other people
Comment from : Shannon

What happened to “strong independent woman who don’t need no man”
Comment from : Malpaw23

Sorry its up to you how u treat mom , rest answer will come back whazs u did will be back Karma
Comment from : samsara boy

I don't know I need help brNo matter how much I try to help My mum isn't impressed and is easily irritated What can I do to change this?
Comment from : Infinite heart Nig

You know you can tell someone stressed simply by their eyes She needs to hold them low to feel healed She needs a vacay
Comment from : Jacob Myrick

Honestly it's the lack of responsibility that women are not expected to uphold, a woman will always be taken care of no matter what No real fear of survival is achieved and they won't make the moves needed to truly needed to thrive brbrIt's truly a bizarre phenomenon that women have given up on actually parenting and more or less just babysitting their own kids
Comment from : Nick Livesay

I like isolation because most of the time other women just talk negative stuff and cry about their own issues with me That is even more exhausting than motherhood as a single mom 😨😨😨
Comment from : Libros, lluvia y café

Thanks for your words! I recall the same experience when I was isolated in my bedroom due to Covid I felt guilty that I enjoyed not having to worry about anyone besides me
Comment from : Michelle Sanchez

I didn't realise this was so widespread I thought it was just me Pregnant mother of 2, stay at home mum, homeschooler and living in the countryside All my family and friends live in the city which is an 8 hour drive from my house Its a beautiful place to live but I'm so isolated and lonely Been very depressed and unmotivated and marriage has suffered
Comment from : gen487

This isn’t a motherhood problem this is a loss of community problem, faced by mother and fathers, women and men This is a problem facing many in the modern world
Comment from : Arthur Andrews

Feminism has destroyed the sanctity of the relationship between man and woman
Comment from : Nico

Yeah and to have the man say… What have u done today? Or how can u be exhausted when didn’t have physical laboring work like me?
Comment from : Chivon Fortney

I think we all underestimate how hard it is and how strong you have to be to tackle the problems you face as a mom
Comment from : Alador

Support system is not existing in my life, yes on the phone but not physically here except school … I am here for my kids, home, animals, catering as best as I can for my partner needs ( not had he ever catered to mine r our kids or animals on any consistent basis) … family 3 hours away with health issues, other part of my family on other side of the world calls one a week for 10 minutes, I inherently struggle make friends, how to be part of community in totally mystery to me … so what can I actually do?
Comment from : Kate Seivwright

it all makes so much sense NOW!brus moms (not all) have always been so depressed because A we're not spending enoughbrtime with other women all my none-depressed friends are constantly hanging out every other daybrim always the one thats like nah i cant make it (due to exhausted) lets stop our loneliness from killing us now
Comment from : SaintAmerican

I think a good place to research would be to look into parenting, not just motherhood Compare the experience of at-home parents (ie both men and women), working parents, part time, etc and see how it varies from person to person I relate to a lot of this as a he/him, and it seems like a lot of nuance is missed by just conflating parenting stress with being "mommy" The big tell is when the speaker talks about "husband" as just another kid/person to take care of, or isolation is a symptom of motherhood There are a hundred layers to all these stresses and emotions; boiling it all down to being "mom" maybe just adds o the problem
Comment from : Timo McIntosh

Google search How to make friends at 36 I spent all of my time working that I don't have friends I'm a single mother with a pair of 13yo twins No one to call and check on me or vise versa No one to call and cry with when I've had a bad day The person I did have passed away in 2021 from COVID, my youngest brother I have another brother but when I try to talk to him I'm mer with bewilderment and judgment I'm so tired
Comment from : TwinkiesMomma

what i find funny is how ppl think motherhood is this fulgilling profescy I honestly feel so bad for mothers who regret motherhood
Comment from : i am someone 😁

So no matter what, being a successful woman with kids, or a stay at home mom is depressing for women? Hahah interesting Sounds like elite problems Everyone is an individual Anyone at anytime can look inside themselves and change their life to fit their idea of how it should be Even going that route has its consequences All choices have consequences Problems, issues, ideas don’t ever stop It’s life I like how her answer is simply “it’s gotta change” Meaningless talk she sounds like she wants to be in an open marriage like many therapist nowadays are
Comment from : Derek R

need more connections i agree somehow
Comment from : Gumuruh Jayadilaga

Men suffer too, I wish I could spend more time with my children
Comment from : Shane Potter

I spend 96 of my time alone as a sahm I feel this in my bones
Comment from : Bel Finnova

Ok but like, how do you wake up and feel human? Basics? To go do said things
Comment from : arh90

Even the dog comes before me in our house!
Comment from : lesley Manchester

But moreover, we only discuss about it but not action taken Maybe that’s why it is still an actuality despite so many years passed by
Comment from : Lobar Kurbanova

watching this for a research paper and i feel i've found a treasure chest thank you so much
Comment from : mahita

Get educate about basic finances, basic investments, taxes, time management, planned parenthood (if you want a kid) , KNOW THAT YOUR CAREER TITLE IS NOT YOU, money comes and goes, and most importantly get educated about ur mental health Thanks for listening to my TED talk
Comment from : shigor

Don't get me wrong in this world filled with feminism I want to be a mom and a wife I just don't want to de depressed and unfulfilled with a toxic marriage and bad relationships with children I really want to break my family's generational curses
Comment from : Shaniah Paster

As a married mother of three I spoke up and was either ignored or medicated It was extremely painful, being made to feel like I was the problem Not my workaholic husband,or my family/friends who abandoned me never checking on me I'm glad people are starting to take notice but can't help but be sad I never got the same
Comment from : confessedbiblioklept

My husband and I have zero support And we feel so isolated it is so hard on our marriage I pray we can come back from this
Comment from : Lauren Lopez

When she mentioned stay at home mom and paused? I felt that!
Comment from : Ashley

I won't be a mother because I'm sure I won't get help from my partner men are comlete toddler in the house they're only good to work
Comment from : laura A

Wish there was more men in this crowd
Comment from : Amy Elgin

Kids are wonderful gifts! ❤️brWe need support, we need to take care of ourselves, and we need people Kids don’t take that away, they just make it more challenging 😋
Comment from : PJ England

Some of us don't have the finances to have over scheduled lives Some of us only have 1 car We don't have the funds for all the extracurricular activities However, what you're saying still holds true But what do those of us do that feel like prisoners in our own homes with only 1 car, which the working spouse takes to work My husband smokes and has 2 other addictions on top of that I used to be a working woman that carried the home and now I'm a sahm with no job, no car, because my husband wrecked it and no one to help I never thought I'd be this sad, weak woman I don't know how to regain my strength my
Comment from : Tavie Savage

Thank you so much! This means more than you know I've spent many days feeling guilty for not being some super mom or for not wanting to play with my kids I love them but I've lost myself in motherhood and I don't know how to make it each day now It's a struggle some days, but I'm trying
Comment from : CozyToni

Because we're moms 😬😬
Comment from : SANTANA Page

A lot of women bring it on themselves Even when they have a man in their life who's a good father, they find a way to screw him over
Comment from : The Dude